Category Archives: Work

The battle to lead starts in my mind.

Life, Topics in Leadership, Work

 

For me, the battle of  leading starts in my mind. Why do I call it a battle? Because good leadership means taking the high road, the ethical road, the humble road, the selfless road.   It takes courage. Too often, I am inclined to make  decisions  out of pride, out of fear,  out of selfishness, or out of people pleasing. This is the battle for my mind. I have seen many others in leadership roles have similar struggles. Somewhere deep inside  insecurities rise up. Often the reaction to the insecurities is to blame someone else for a problem, to be evasive rather than truthful when giving feedback, to minimize bad news rather than take it head on, or simply to avoid dealing with problems all together.

Why do I fight the battle for my mind rather than  give in? The organization I work for and the people I work with rely on me to make decisions that are best for the company. They rely on me to confront problems. They rely on me to make choices that move the agency forward. To make make choices that allow us to more effectively accomplish the mission of the agency.

So what I have I found that helps me fight this battle for my mind?

  1. I seek to know what my insecurities are, acknowledge them, and challenge them.
  2. I allow myself  to be open to criticism from anyone in our organization. I make it known that I have an open door policy and that I would rather people come and tell me any problem they have with me than talk behind my back.
  3. I work hard at listening to others and not being defensive when I am criticized. This is not easy but with practice it  becomes a great learning tool.
  4. I practice stress management. For me this involves what I like to refer to as my three kinds of medication. Exercise, journaling, and meditation/prayer using Scripture (Lectio Divina).

The thing about this battle is that it never ends. Pressures wax and wane.  Demands layer on top of each other. Every day, every month, every quarter, ever year brings new threats, new opportunities, and new challenges.

Those of us in leadership must actively engage the conflict between our insecurities and being the person  our organization needs us to be.

 

Some days …

Life, Topics in Leadership, Work

Organizational leadership. What does it mean…in a practical sense? Some days…

It means giving your best employees a pep talk during a crisis.
It means reassuring staff that you are going to take care of a uneasy situation so that they are safe.
It means showing up in the middle of a mess and working side by side with staff until it is resolved.
It means listening to staff vent their true feelings even if it hurts.
It means getting staff what they need.
It means having hard conversations.
It means making sure the people who are the heart and soul of your organization know they are the heart and soul of the organization.
Its moving the agency,  even on tough days,  toward the mission.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Be thankful for your incognito teachers.

Faith, Life, Topics in Leadership, Work

 

The Creator uses some of the most difficult people in our lives as teachers. I wouldn’t  have the knowledge and understanding I do about organizational leadership if it were not for those individuals over the years who at points in my journey had me at a breaking point. This realization came into focus this past week.  I was in a conversation with a colleague. It was a congenial, collaborative conversation about the work we do and the work we want to do to make a difference in the lives of others. I realized during the conversation that we were very aligned. What made the awareness peculiar is that  we have not always been aligned. In fact at a few points in our relationship we have been at tremendous odds.

As I thought about those difficult times in our work together I came to a realization that this individual has been one of my greatest teachers.  It was instruction that could be characterized as ,”learning the hard way.”  As I reflected on  our difficult times and how much I had learned a message floated across my mind. The Creator had used him to help me grow up as a leader. I began to think about others who have served as teachers I didn’t ask for or recognize but who have helped me develop as a leader.

A handful of people came to mind. I thought of the lessons I had learned from them. I’ve learned that hiring someone who fits our agency’s mission and values is more important than hiring someone for the skills  they possess. I learned that having the right person in the wrong position creates frustration for everyone. I learned that taking care of problems when they are small is really important because problems generally do not go away, they just get bigger and do  more damage. I’ve learned the importance of listening to warning signals. I’ve learned its okay to do a 180 degree turn when you need to. I’ve learned to ask for help when I need it. I’ve learned that collaboration builds a stronger organization. I could go on and on.

As I make the list I am thinking of names of people I have worked with in various capacities. Whether our relationship was marked by conflict or agreement I realize that they were in my life to teach me. I think the reason The Creator put them there incognito is because I wouldn’t have chosen them as teachers. I think I would have gravitated to  people who would have been safe rather than pushed me into places I didn’t want to go. Sometimes being in those places had me crying out for relief or  for a different job. Relief did not always come very quickly and I am still in the same job (thank you God). I feel a little wiser. Part of that wisdom is knowing that more lessons will come. After all, like all of us, I am in a dynamic developmental process and I need teachers.

 

 

 

 

In Leadership, There Are Good Days and There Are Bad Days.

Faith, Mental Health, Topics in Leadership, Work

 

Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash

The realty of leading an organization is that there will always be good times and there will always be bad times. The love for the work, the love for the mission , and a sense of the stress being temporary sustains a leader during the rough times.

This week I was having a conversation with a  friend of mine who also leads a nonprofit organization.  He was at his wits end and  in the midst of some really difficult issues with his staff. He described feeling stabbed-in-the-back,  ineffective, and be unable to lead his team. Several times in the conversation he talked about it being time for him to leave his job and move on.

I wanted to support my friend but I also wanted to be genuine with him. So I listened.  I told him about some of my dark times and times I wanted to quit. I also reminded him that the dark times pass. I shared my thoughts on how to manage this rough patch. I reminded him that organizations are dynamic and leadership is an ever evolving event. An organization is new everyday. Every day a leader can make decisions and take actions that reshapes things and solves problems to move the organization  toward accomplishing its mission.  And yet, there will still be challenging times.

After we had discussed the ups and downs of leading an agency, I reminded  my friend  he had all the skill he needed to get through this difficult period and continue to move the organization forward. I also told him that only he could decide if his love for the work and the mission  was enough to put up with the  nerve-wracking  times.

At the end of our talk I could tell by his voice that a sense of hope was rising. I’m glad.

Sometimes leading…

Faith, Life, Topics in Leadership, Work

 

Sometimes leading feels like I am walking in a stream, with the current and having a clear path. Everything flows nicely and gently.

Sometimes leading feels like I am walking in a stream against the current. It’s hard. My steps are slow and I get tired, but I must keep stepping forward.

Sometimes leading feels like I am walking in a stream against the current during a storm. I am getting really wet and weighed down by the rain. I slog against the current with a sense that I might go under.

Sometimes leading feels like I am walking in a steam in the dark with a lot of big rocks in the way. It’s hard to find the right path. I bump into few rocks when I’m trying to decide which way to go. I back up and try a different direction. Always guided by,
what is true,
what is right,
what is fair,
what is ethical.

Sometimes leading feels like walking in a stream, with the current on a bright warm day. And it all–
the good,
the bad,
the easy,
and the hard,
make sense.

 

I have decided after several conversations today that most people want to have things their way.

Faith, Life, Topics in Leadership, Work

I have decided after several conversations today that most people want to have things their way. The problem with this approach to life is that it  stalls momentum, kills creativity,  or moves things forward tainted by resentment.

What is the alternative? I have to turn to ancient wisdom:

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves. -Paul of Tarsus

Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less. -C. S. Lewis

 

 

 

 

Leading when you you feel lousy.

Mental Health, Topics in Leadership, Work

 

How do you handle a demanding day when your attention, your focus, your understanding, and your leadership are needed by your team and you are not feeling well? On Thursday I had that day.  I was tired and emotionally depleted having spent most of the previous day on the road traveling to and from a family funeral. I was leaving that Thursday afternoon​ for a long trip to my daughter’s graduation. That same day also happened to be the third in a row of labor intensive construction of a new electronic medical record at our agency. In addition, I had four different department meetings scheduled  to work through issues that required my best concentration and problem solving.  I was stressed and had a headache that felt like a vice grip from my shoulders up.

Days like this require an extra effort at self-control and self-awareness. I made this list of things I try to do on days I feel lousy while at the same time my focus and leadership are necessary.

  1. Decision making is one of the primary tasks of a leader. On a day you are feeling lousy give yourself more time to think through decisions. Tell your team you are considering options and need some time to think about it.
  2. When you feel lousy it may seem like everything is closing in on you. Find five minutes to go to your office, close the door, and do deep breathing exercises.
  3. When you are tired and stressed even little things can seem huge. Set up a mental rule to not respond to people who are making you feel irritated. Take deep breaths. Jot down a note about the thing that is irritating you and deal with it when you feel better.
  4. When you are stressed you may feel pressured to do something that in reality can wait. Go to a trusted coworker, tell them how you feel.  Ask them point blank if your thinking on a subject is clear and if a decision can wait.
  5. Drink a lot of water.
  6. Focus on simple tasks that take less mental energy.
  7. Go outside and walk around the building.
  8. When you are stressed it is easy to perseverate on the negative and make mountains out of mole hills. Have a positive, affirming verse, poem, or phrase to repeat in your mind when you became negative or feel overwhelmed.
  9. Think about what is going well so your view of problems gain some perspective.
  10. In order to use what energy you have where it is most important, reschedule any meetings that you can.
  11. Take care of yourself today so you can be at your best later.

Lessons from saying “thank you” to two long time employees.

Life, Mental Health, Topics in Leadership, Work

This week at work we spent time focusing on our staff. On Monday we had a staff recognition luncheon. We recognized staff for working at our agency for five, ten, fifteen, twenty and twenty-five years.  The big emphasis of the week; however, was on honoring the two staff members who have worked with the organization since it opened twenty-six years ago. Not only have they worked for the same organization since it opened but they have essentially been in the same jobs doing excellent work. They were each given their own special day.  They received awards, gift cards, flowers, and balloons to let them know how much their career long work is appreciated. We all wore buttons proclaiming the special day for each of the two and they got parking spots designated only for them. What made the week so uplifting was to see how much everyone enjoyed recognizing their co-workers. The two honored were all smiles and were genuinely appreciative. Here are some of the takeaways I had from being part of this:

  • It was fun to see the creativity, energy, and passion of the planning team.  They were committed to  making sure that our staff felt appreciated and honored for the commitment they make to be part of our agency. Being part of planning the celebration  meant a lot to the team.
  • The smiles and air of joy the two long term employees had on “their” day was awesome. It was planned as a surprise so when they saw the parking spots, the buttons, and the gifts  it was clear they were overwhelmed. Their smiles made everyone smile.
  • Staff recognized for their various lengths of stay felt acknowledged for reaching a milestone. It is important  to celebrate milestones.
  • The joy caused by showing someone how appreciated they are has a ripple effect.
  • It reinforced to me the fact that it takes a lot more than salary and benefits to make a good work climate. Most of us want to know our work has meaning and that we are making a difference. When the organization can give its members that feedback it improves the climate.
  • Celebrating achievements, both small and large, is essential for the morale of an organization.
  • Getting staff involved in planning shows them respect and turns out a better product. Diverse feedback and problem solving reduces the risk of negative unintended consequences or forgetting something important.
  • I often think about how blessed I am to have the great management team and staff around me that I do. I need to make sure that I tell people that when I think it.

Love Each Other or Perish

Faith, Life, Mental Health, Topics in Leadership, Work

My wife made this for my office. I wanted this message to be the first thing people see when they walk in. Its from Mitch Albom’s book Tuesday’s with Morrie. The author is paraphrasing Morrie’s favorite poet W.H. Auden in his poem September 1, 1939. 

Negative emotions, whether they be jealousy, resentment, envy, greed, or  unhealthy pride tear agencies and businesses apart. So often as an agency director, whether it be at my organization or another,  I have seen destructive  emotions lead to divisions between individuals and teams . These dark feelings, when harbored,  stifle the ability of an organization to accomplish its mission. Conflicts and disagreements are necessary and healthy. They are often the fuel for the energy that leads to healthy change. But in the end, it is things like truth, forgiveness, humility, and kindness that create the organizational climate and culture for staying power and growth in an organization.