All posts by Jerry Strausbaugh

About Jerry Strausbaugh

I am a husband, dad, and director of a community agency for mental health, housing, and domestic violence shelter. I love to help people be all God created them to be.

Stressed out

Life, Mental Health

Since Monday I have had a chance to give four presentations about stress management to local high school students.  Its a topic near and dear to my heart because I have to work hard at it [stress management]  myself. Here is the gist of what I said to the teens.

A scale is a great way to think of stress management. We can’t avoid stress. Stress comes from the good things and bad things in life. The key is to balance the amount of stress we experience  with an equal or greater amount of coping skills.

  • A 2015 American Psychological Association  study found that teenagers (Millennials) report higher levels of stress than adults. (http://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2015/snapshot.aspx).
  • Teens are sleep deprived and it leads to increased feelings of stress and anxiety. (https://med.stanford.edu/news/all-news/2015/10/among-teens-sleep-deprivation-an-epidemic.html)
  • Greater use of social media may increase the likelihood of experiencing depression. ( http://www.upmc.com/media/NewsReleases/2016/Pages/lin-primack-sm-depression.aspx

The students I met with identified their top five stressors as:

  • Family issues (conflict).
  • School issues (testing, homework, difficulty with learning).
  • Money issues (not enough money for college).
  • Peer/Friendship issues (conflict, drama).
  • Depression.

We spent time talking about ways to counter the stress they feel. I shared the importance of taking care of our mind, body and spirit.

  • Exercise is very effective at helping the body manage stress and combat depression. (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC474733/).
  • Journaling helps to put our thoughts on paper and untangle the mess in our head. (http://www.depressiontoolkit.org/takecare/journaling.asp)
  • Mindfulness has a growing body of research pointing to its benefits related to stress management. (http://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/07-08/ce-corner.aspx
  • Additionally I suggested they…
    • Read good books
    • Keep a humor library
    • Carve in more time for sleep
    • Cultivate good friendships
    • Pray (and like in the AA 12 steps, believe that a power greater than themselves can restore them to sanity).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Community: A cool cloth on a warm forehead. 

Faith, Life, The Church

This is a story of the healing  power of a supportive community.  About how the Creator works  through the care and  compassion of family, neighbors and friends.

So this past week my wife, Jane, was diagnosed with both the flu (influenza b) and  pneumonia. She  was very sick. I had  not seen her this ill  in our 27 years of marriage. Her body was failing fast. Our family physician prescribed medications  but in the initial 24 hour period after seeing him she got worse. I was worried. This is when we began to experience the unseen hand of God through the care of compassion of family and friends.

Family.  First, on Saturday, the day after seeing our family doctor, my sister-in-law, Gail, called. She had pneumonia a few years ago and was really worried about Jane. Because she had experienced pneumonia, Gail was able to tell Jane’s symptoms were reaching a critical place and she encouraged me to call for  more help.  I did and we wound up in our local emergency department (E.D.).

Neighbors.  Because we live in a wonderful small town, the first person we see in the E.D. is our neighbor who is a nurse there. She settled us in and was able to get Jane set up with some ice and a warm blanket. The second person we encountered was the nurse who provided the rest of Jane’s care.  Wouldn’t you know,  she too is a friend. She volunteers at the local domestic violence shelter that is part the organization I work for. She set Jane up with fluids, blood work, and other medications as directed by the physician.  I am sure we would have gotten great care by anyone at our local hospital; however, as God would have it, it was provided by two people who knew us, and because of that, were able to make things all the more comfortable. After a couple hours of good treatment  at the E.D. Jane was stabilized and we were able to go home.

Friends.  Because of my concern about Jane I had sent out an email asking for prayer  to our small group from the church we attend. I also told our neighbors from across the street, Tom and Patty,  who have become dear friends of ours.  Patty leads a   Bible study that Jane is a part of. Within a  few minutes of us returning home from the E.D. Tom brought over a hot meal for Jane and I to share. Within an hour of being home Jane’s Bible study group sent her a text saying the members where bringing us dinner every night this past week and outlined who would be bringing it. Our small group sent texts, calls, food and a novel for Jane to read while she was stuck on the couch. A coworker of Jane’s dropped off a meal. Our niece dropped off soup. Our daughter stopped by with cake and flowers. The entire eight days Jane was down we felt a daily portion of love, mercy, and grace from the Creator through people. We felt it not only from the gifts that met our physical needs but also from the prayers and words of encouragement that  filled us spiritually.

Its been a  week. Jane is on the road to recovery. I have gotten to experience first hand the power of community. I read so often about how God works through people; about how love is the most powerful force in the universe. This past week I lived it. Because I have felt what a difference it can make, I am compelled  to pass it along.

 

Love Each Other or Perish

Faith, Life, Mental Health, Topics in Leadership, Work

My wife made this for my office. I wanted this message to be the first thing people see when they walk in. Its from Mitch Albom’s book Tuesday’s with Morrie. The author is paraphrasing Morrie’s favorite poet W.H. Auden in his poem September 1, 1939. 

Negative emotions, whether they be jealousy, resentment, envy, greed, or  unhealthy pride tear agencies and businesses apart. So often as an agency director, whether it be at my organization or another,  I have seen destructive  emotions lead to divisions between individuals and teams . These dark feelings, when harbored,  stifle the ability of an organization to accomplish its mission. Conflicts and disagreements are necessary and healthy. They are often the fuel for the energy that leads to healthy change. But in the end, it is things like truth, forgiveness, humility, and kindness that create the organizational climate and culture for staying power and growth in an organization.

 

Dinner in the Circle

Faith, Life, The Church, Work

During the school year, on the first and third Wednesdays, from 5:30 PM to 7:00 PM , after I get off work, I help serve meals at a local church.  The food is great; things like homemade soup, spaghetti, baked potatoes with toppings, tacos, lasagna, and other wonderful dishes. They are served with a side, dessert, and drink. The cost is $3 for an individual and $12 for a family of four or more. The people who prepare the meals, serve the meals, bus the tables, wash the dishes, and clean up afterward are the best people I know. There are seven or so of them. They come from all walks of life. A teacher, a local election board employee, a medical  office manager, a steel worker, a director of nursing, a retired factory worker, and an accounting clerk. They serve food, handout drinks, and visit with the guests, There is a table of 80-90 year old widows, single mom’s thankful they don’t have to cook that night, grandparents helping to raise grand-kids, retired couples, families of all shapes and sizes. The atmosphere of the meal is like oxygen. People are smiling, laughing, and encouraging one another. The people serving work together like a well oiled machine.

No matter how tired, grouchy, or worried I am when I  get there, I feel better by 7:00 PM. It’s kind of counter-intuitive but after the 90 -120 minutes of work  I am happy and my soul feels full. I have read that the evidence that God is in the midst of something is that is characterized by this: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, and self-control. These are the words I would use to describe the meal and those I work with to put it on. I am thankful I get to be part of it. 

Some Things I learned About Teenagers this Weekend

Faith, Life, The Church

My wife and I are just coming off spending MLK weekend with 100 teenagers at an outdoor camp in rural Richland County Ohio.  The area is surrounded by state park forests and private farm land.  The youth pastor of our church asked us to help out with the youth group’s annual  winter event known as “Snow Retreat”. Jane and I have always loved working with teenagers. I guess it makes us feel young. As the weekend wore on I started to notice a few realities about the teens there  that run may contrary to what we often think about today’s youth.

  1. Despite video games, virtual reality  and social media, kids still love to play real, authentic, live games  and have crazy fun doing so. All weekend long there were rousing games going on. Some were new generation games like hantis , gaga ball, and 9 square in the air;  some were old generation games like basketball and dodgeball; some were table sports like pool, air-hockey, and ping-pong; some were  table games like, euchre or Uno. The kids didn’t seem to miss their cell phones or complain they couldn’t get a signal. They were having to too much fun to realize it.
  2. Kids love being outside. I led a  hike up to a local summit. Not only did several kids sign up to go on the hike but they loved it. They seemed to be invigorated by the long, cold hike and were taking pictures at the top so they could  show their friends their accomplishment. Some of the younger kids had a blast rolling down the very tall peak we were on. They were also totally intrigued by the natural spring that provided a marvelous flow of clean water at the near the bottom of the peak.
  3. When given a safe space to do so, kids will share their story. There were three times we met in small groups with the teenagers  this weekend. The theme for the weekend was “Being Good Soil”. The speaker challenged to youth to consider what barriers they have that prevent them from being all that God has created them to be. In the small groups the youth supported each other as they talked about their lives and the struggles they have. It was such a privilege to simply be a listening ear to support them as they shared.
  4. Kids want to find a deeper meaning to their life.  Dan Perkins (2007)* identifies four questions that teenagers are wrestling through. Teens are asking  Who am I?   Am I normal? Am I competent? Am I lovable and loving? The many conversations I had the students this weekend reflected this quest. Teenagers want to live lives that matter and that make a difference in the world.
  5. Teens are not afraid of hard work. Throughout the weekend the teens at camp cleaned tables and moved equipment. On the last day they cleaned bathrooms, cleaned cabins, loaded trailers with heavy equipment, swept floors, and took out garbage. They worked together, and  had a good time doing it.
  6. Don’t judge a book by its cover.  There are always kids who stay in the margins. Who have trouble fitting in and then take on the “outsider” role. I had the chance to speak with a young man who fits this category. I asked questions. Listened to his story. Found out a lot about him. I found out this young “outsider” is really a sensitive, kind young man who has tremendous strengths. Several of us adults came up with some ways to us his strengths help him feel part of the group.
  7. God is at work. What often seems like problems are  really  God rearranging  the plan we came up with to replace it with his perfect plan. An example is that the main speaker for the weekend got sick and could not come. Our youth pastor stepped right in. He delivered the message that God had for the teens there this weekend.
  8. God is in pursuit.  Over and over this weekend I heard “God is really trying to tell me….” or “God is saying ….to me.” Though it may seem irrational to some, I witnessed a loving, comforting, affirming God reach out and speak to the young people he has so fearfully and wonderfully made.

 

  • Perkins, D. F.  (1997, 2007). Adolescence: The Four Questions. University of Florida, IFAS Extension. FCS 2117.   (http://moodle.ecampusalberta.ca/groups/file.php/13/the_four_questions.pdf)

 

Being a Thankful Leader

Faith, Topics in Leadership, Work

thank-you

I spend a lot of  time at work thinking about  problems. Problems from funding changes, to regulatory changes, to juggling the budget, to trying to hire good staff in the midst of a statewide workforce shortage, to making sure our agency is on the forefront of meeting the housing, trauma recovery, and mental health needs of our community. There are many times it feels overwhelming. Today though, on Thanksgiving, I want to take the time to share the specific blessings I experienced this year.

  • After more than a year of looking for a full time  psychiatrist God provided a great one. He is a wonderful team player and his patients love him.
  • One of our key administrators moved and we were able to find a highly qualified replacement who is a great problem solver.
  • This week two experienced social workers walked in and applied for jobs we had openings for.
  • This week a great employee who had taken another job came back.
  • We had an opening for a cleaning position and were able to fill it with a real go-getter who had just lost hours at another job.
  • After looking for a support staff for several weeks we just hired a really dynamic candidate.
  • Our clinical director has created a tight-knit  team of counselors and case managers that work together and get great results.
  • Our HR manager  has developed a fantastic orientation for new employees and is putting together a great recruitment and retention plan.
  • Our domestic violence shelter has started several new support groups.
  • A state and local grant allowed us to expand services to our county jail.
  • After a major local tragedy our agency was able to provide critical incident stress support to several local groups.
  • We have opportunities to expand our equine therapy program.
  • This year we partnered with our local schools to start a kindergarten readiness program.
  • We’ve identified several other partnerships we can develop to have an even greater impact in our community.
  • Our financial statements look solid.
  • Our shelter director had gotten new grants and strengthened funding for all its programs.
  • We have purchased new billing software which will strengthen our accounts receivable.
  • We’ve been nominated for social service agency of  the year through our local chamber of commerce.

So many blessings. So many answers to prayer.

Personally I’m blessed with an amazing wife and soulmate. I have three amazing daughters. I’m blessed with friends, a great church and opportunities  to use the gifts God has given me.

May all if you have a peaceful Thanksgiving. Let’s also try to count our blessings a lot more often.

What in the World Happened to Coffee?

Life, The Joy (and humor) of raising girls.

coffee_20101231_bg_0204

On Saturday my wife and I were Christmas shopping at a local mall. We wandered into a fancy kitchen store to get ideas for gifts for our family. We got to the section of the store where they displayed coffee makers. As I am staring at the 22 rows of various machines all designed to do one thing, mix coffee grounds and water together, I have an incredible flashback to the simple ceramic coffee percolator my aunt used to make her coffee in. I compared her simple electric appliance to the pour-over, french press, computerized, grinding, steaming, and cold brewing options of today. I looked at my wife and asked “What in the world has happened to coffee?”

I have been a coffee drinker my whole life. It is a comfort food for me. I remember coming home from high school and drinking coffee and eating homemade cookies with my mom. I remember mom perking a full pot for my dad before he went off to work the midnight shift at a local hospital. Growing up, the coffee was brewed in a stove top percolator. I can remember watching every night as the water bubbling up into the glass top turned from clear to dark brown meaning the java was ready to be served. Later my parents switched to a Mr. Coffee drip machine. Still, sometimes, my dad would simply boil the grounds in water in a pot on the stove when he didn’t want to mess with the coffee maker. They usually bought the brand that was on sale. It didn’t really matter whether it was Folgers, or Maxwell House, Hills Brothers, or A&P.  Nowadays I don’t buy the large container my parents used to get. I go for a little higher end beans in the 12 oz bags. My coffee sensitivity has been honed.

My love for coffee has been transferred to my three daughters. Each one of them is a serious consumer of the magical beverage. My oldest has a special coffee nook in her apartment. My middle daughter works at a specialty coffee shop and is learning to roast beans. My youngest has two or three cups every morning. It seems to becoming one of the tides that bind.

All of that being said, after 40 years of drinking coffee every day, I have to ask: what has happened to coffee? It used to be simple, black or with cream and/or sugar. Now it comes in endless flavors, with soy milk, with steamed milk, as a  latte, as a frappe, or any number of other choices. I need a dictionary to order a drink at most coffee shops. My daughter who roasts coffee wants a certain kind of coffee maker for Christmas. It took her a half hour to explain the way it mixes coffee grounds and water is superior to the way my coffee pot does. I’m not convinced.

Tomorrow morning I’ll have my simple black coffee as I get ready for the day. The same drink I have had for the last 40 years.  I know my three daughters will be having a black coffee too. Theirs may come out of a fancy machine or a trendy pour-over gadget. In the end I guess it doesn’t matter. It’s that enchanting drink that has been shared in my family for generations. I may not understand how complicated it has become but I do appreciate it as a beverage that has created fond memories and a connection between generations past and future.

corning-ware-coffee  My aunt’s electric percolator *

stove-top-perculator   My parents’ stove top percolator *

*examples