The Creator uses some of the most difficult people in our lives as teachers. I wouldn’t  have the knowledge and understanding I do about organizational leadership if it were not for those individuals over the years who at points in my journey had me at a breaking point. This realization came into focus this past week.  I was in a conversation with a colleague. It was a congenial, collaborative conversation about the work we do and the work we want to do to make a difference in the lives of others. I realized during the conversation that we were very aligned. What made the awareness peculiar is that  we have not always been aligned. In fact at a few points in our relationship we have been at tremendous odds.

As I thought about those difficult times in our work together I came to a realization that this individual has been one of my greatest teachers.  It was instruction that could be characterized as ,”learning the hard way.”  As I reflected on  our difficult times and how much I had learned a message floated across my mind. The Creator had used him to help me grow up as a leader. I began to think about others who have served as teachers I didn’t ask for or recognize but who have helped me develop as a leader.

A handful of people came to mind. I thought of the lessons I had learned from them. I’ve learned that hiring someone who fits our agency’s mission and values is more important than hiring someone for the skills  they possess. I learned that having the right person in the wrong position creates frustration for everyone. I learned that taking care of problems when they are small is really important because problems generally do not go away, they just get bigger and do  more damage. I’ve learned the importance of listening to warning signals. I’ve learned its okay to do a 180 degree turn when you need to. I’ve learned to ask for help when I need it. I’ve learned that collaboration builds a stronger organization. I could go on and on.

As I make the list I am thinking of names of people I have worked with in various capacities. Whether our relationship was marked by conflict or agreement I realize that they were in my life to teach me. I think the reason The Creator put them there incognito is because I wouldn’t have chosen them as teachers. I think I would have gravitated to  people who would have been safe rather than pushed me into places I didn’t want to go. Sometimes being in those places had me crying out for relief or  for a different job. Relief did not always come very quickly and I am still in the same job (thank you God). I feel a little wiser. Part of that wisdom is knowing that more lessons will come. After all, like all of us, I am in a dynamic developmental process and I need teachers.