Today is the last day of Black History Month. Over the last few years my life has been enriched by Black professors, coworkers, doctoral students, and authors that I have had the privilege to know and learn from. They have helped me learn to value diverse opinions and appreciate stories and life experiences that are different from my own. We are a nation increasingly defined by our differences, be they color, political, religious, or economic. We forget that, despite our differences, we share what makes us human. The desire to love and be loved, to care for our families and children, to succeed by using the talents and abilities God has given us, and to live the best life possible. May God help us be better at seeing the best in others and giving our best to others. 

Each week I record five 1-minute messages about mental health and wellness, played on local radio stations. The goal is to promote mental health awareness and resilience. I try to be timely and tie the “mental health minute” to calendar or current events. This month, I recorded five of the minutes featuring quotes by Black leaders whose writings have impacted me. Here are the leaders, their quotes, and my brief application to mental health.  

Dr. Martin Luther King Junior: 

“I refuse to accept the view that mankind is so tragically bound to the starless midnight of racism and war that the bright-daybreak-of-peace-and-brotherhood can never become a reality…. I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word.” 

When our country is increasingly polarized, decide to be a peacemaker. Find ways to build honest and understanding relationships. It is the most important thing you can do for our national mental health.  

Booker T Washington: 

“Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached-in-life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed.” 

One of the most destructive things we can do is compare ourselves to others. We always come up short. Set personal goals rather than using other people’s lives as a measuring stick for your success. Take stock of your own progress and let that be your motivation to take the next step.  

Maya Angelou: 

“Won’t it be wonderful when black history and Native American history and Jewish history and all of U.S. history is taught from one book…Just U.S. history.” 

The United States is and has been made up of the stories of countless individuals who have unique life experiences. Valuing that uniqueness can be healing. Validating someone’s story by honoring their life experience as truly important-and meaningful is essential to-a healthy-mature self-esteem. You have the power to make someone else know they matter.   

Barack Obama: 

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” 

One of the pieces of advice I give adolescents is stop blaming others for their problems and focus on how they can be the solution. When you blame others, you give away your power to fix things. When you focus on how you can solve problems you become a difference maker.  

W. E. B. Bu Bois: 

“Read some good, heavy, serious books just for discipline: Take yourself in hand and master yourself. Make-yourself do unpleasant things so as to gain the upper hand of your soul.” 

Depression makes us want to shut down. Push back against that urge. Challenge yourself to learn new skills, learn about new subjects that interest you, have experiences that open you up to new ways of thinking, or visit unfamiliar places. These all help us overcome depression and combat stress. 

Friends let us commit ourselves to widening our circle of fellowship, friendship and those who speak into our life to include people who have stories different from our own.  

Have you ever had one of THOSE weeks where your head, body, and confidence are all suffering? I wrote this a week ago:

This week  I’ve battled through a two-day headache, did an important presentation on the fly while not feeling great, been frustrated almost daily because our IT hardware is struggling to keep up with the demand making important meetings very awkward, felt like I fumbled through leading  our monthly all-team meeting (one of the most important things I do), and keenly felt the loss of our long time faithful finance director as we struggle to replace him.

While these things were all going on I was also dealing with a louder than normal nagging voice that tells me I am not enough, I am a weak leader, I don’t have what it takes, and people don’t like me.

By God’s grace I got through the week better than my head, body, and feelings told me I was doing. I wasn’t perfect but as I reflect on that week the reality is I don’t have to be perfect. I need to be faithful. The sacred writings of my faith tradition remind me that,

*When I am at my weakest my Creator is with me at his strongest.
*Though I stumble I am not utterly cast down.
*My Creator’s strength is made perfect in my weakness.
*My Creator’s right hand holds me up when I cannot hold myself up.
*My Creator will renew my strength.
*Though I walk through the valley…My Creator lends his rod to protect me and staff to guide me. 
*My Creator fights for me. All I need to do is be still.

This week I have felt better and thought better.
I have pressed into things with more vigor.
By God’s grace I will, one step at a time, keep moving forward remembering I do not walk alone. 

I am writing this post for all of my friends who are 50+ years old and who occasionally find themselves questioning whether they are running their race well. Who wonder if they got off on an inferior path. Who may be interrogating themselves about the choices they have made. 

I was attacked in the middle of the night by an unholy thought. It went like this,
“You have blown it. You can’t retire.  You will have to work (if you can) until you are 70. If you would have been this or done that you’d be sitting pretty, but now it’s too late. The die is cast.“
A deluge of life regrets were encroaching upon me. I felt I had run the race but not executed a winning game plan.

After several minutes I was able to get my mind out in front of this self-deprecating place.  I began to meditate on ancient immutable wisdom. I changed the paradigm and looked at myself using a different theoretical frame. I came to a different conviction than the one that had troubled me in the middle of the night. My resolution, 

I reject all of the cultural lies and all of the “can’ts” and “shoulds” of  American middle class aging. The truth of the matter is I am on a lifelong call. The Reality is I am on a mission from the Creator of the Universe. This mission has eternal implications. 

So in order to place myself in the redemptive  story of the ages I will by God’s grace  not allow myself to be constrained by conventional wisdom, by messaging from interest groups, by images from the media, or by any other principality or power that would seek to define what it means to be getting older.

While I am aging I will yoke myself to 
running forward toward whatever God-given tasks lie ahead of me,
uncovering abilities that I have let lay dormant,
evolving into the most ethical human being I can be ,
transforming into my best self,
honing the gifts The Maker of All Things has given me,
creating new things with the power the Creator has granted me,
adding new stories to the universe,
fulfilling the call to lift up and serve others,

and if I am knocked down, I will get back up and keep on running. 

Friends, I invite you to join me.